The eternal dilemma – go or not? Take risk with benefits or not because of possibility losing anything? “If I risk, I’ll gain what I wanted. Hey! But I don’t want to lose what I have now! I won’t have it anymore if I go ahead…” – thoughts like that fight with each other in every human’s mind. Sometimes it’s comes to small stuff and we forget fast about inner discord, another time thoughts come back and certain topics stay unresolved for a long time. For many of us taking a risk is sometimes really hard. How do people take risk? After all, not always it’s connected only with benefits…
Taking a risk – what does it mean?
Taking a risk is when you do something that makes you feel insecurity, fright and you’re not sure if that something will give you something good, pleasant or maybe just the opposite. For example, you have a job, and you just got an offer of another job, and you don’t know what to do – stay in your current work or maybe take the new one.
Here’s the thing – you know your present workplace, you know what you can expect there more or less. For your brain that’s safe, because that’s something you know. The new workplace – that is something very new – new place, new boss, new people, new rules, maybe new specificity of job. You have some imaginations, predictions, but that’s all. Even if we rationally know what can waits on us in new place, our emotional perspective can screams: “DANGER! Not-known, don’t go.”
Our psychics are afraid of new things, and it’s normal. That’s quite healthy reaction. We experience it in less and greater extent – in social interactions, in our inner introspections, changing work, place of living etc.
There are different factors that can decide how the things go on when you’ll take a risk and you don’t know them.
You don’t know them or you don’t know what they bring in the future or when you’ll gain any benefits from them. For instance, if you have just started learning how to program applications and you have goal of earning from it, you don’t know when you get some money from creating such things or when a company hires you. Maybe your first interviews will enough for recruiters or maybe you’ll find a work after a year of trying. Programming skill is not simple and acquisition it lasts long, and creating something in that area is really complicated process. So I can say that you take a precarious matter 😉
Does it mean it’s wrong? Though, most of people don’t get through that kind of challenge. Another aspect of that matter is that happens not because they can’t or aren’t able to, but because it’s easier to give up, let go, and because such deals require us to be persistent. Skills, goals and something like those call us to constant coming back to state of focus, to keep on thinking, keep believing, giving hand to spirit of activeness and holding a huge sign of movement: “Do not give up”.
That’s great awakening. But to implementing the above sentences we need to understand the following point:
Benefits of risk taking
- To develop your own personality, potential, good features and your own business
- You gain chance on something better than something that you have now
- You can learn new things or skills, no matter whether things go well or fail
- The next benefit of taking a risk is your own satisfaction (and other pleasant emotions)
- People come out of life on the brake on and feel more free
- You learn how to dare wisely
- You get your own acknowledge
- The world gets something good from you 🙂
- To grow immunity to failure, at least to some extent
- Your fear stops capturing you and you learn dealing with emotions
- You gain a better job where you are respected
- Financial gains when you risk in business
Underneath taking chanes there’s satisfying our needs. That’s why people take risks. And we venture when we want something more than we have currently.
Also, we need to understand the above list well and in proper context, i.e. taking a risk in itself won’t guarantee that you’ll handle emotions well, in that matter you need to do job in your mind through i.e. mindfulness and building inner power. Activities that are precarious just open your triggers that you can face.
I mentioned also that the world gets something from you when you dare in life. Yes, you enrich all the world when you move. I.e. when you feel desire to thank somebody for good gesture, warm words or support and you go to the person and express it, your heart is lifting, somebody’s heart is touched, and that brings beauty to the world.
About living on the brake on – it’s about patterns of thinking (i.e.: “my friend didn’t answer my phone so it means she’s ignoring me again”, feeling (for instance sadness, disappointment) and behaving (yelling at the friend at the following meeting or not answering when she calls back) that don’t serve us, but we maintain them, most commonly unconsciously. When we have lots of untrue beliefs, deep inside we feel blockade, even if we’re able to not see it. But more about it in another article.
You won’t gain quick success in your company if you analyzed data mistakenly. Usually we don’t appreciate ourselves if we do something just because of being under the influence of emotions. Our personalities probably will not strengthen if what we take is kind of “head or tails”.
We acquire ability to venture wisely when we take chances quite often, usually making mistakes, at that time we verify things. Simultaneously, if we manage our psyches well and still working on them, we acquire also resistance to failure.
Why taking risks is benefit in contact with people?
We already know that it’s important to do risky things in life, in dreams and in business. Another matter is social aspect, why is it so important? Well, there are benefits of taking a risk:
- new friends and connections
- verifying existing relations, even if that’s very hard thing to take
- crawling out of toxic relation
- our minds code also good experience with people
- we gain courage that can entail boldness on other areas of life
- exploring your traumas and chances to take care of them
- we get to know things that we didn’t know
- also, we learn how to exist with people, how to do something together and how to cooperate in not hurting way and to not be hurt so often
- and other unexpected things
The above benefits of risk taking are available when you open up.
New friends are goods in themselves. You can count on somebody in harder whiles. Not to mention that relations always go hand in hand with certain gains.
When you reveal things about yourself and you didn’t do that before, you have chance to see if current friends want authentic you. Maybe you’ll feel rejection or maybe they’ll accept you quite normally, perhaps they’ll even understand you what makes you feel better in that world. On the basic of sum of new (and the old too) experiences you’ll see if it’s worth to continue contact.
Doing something in one field can translate into other areas of life. When we get on well with people, we have more courage to dare everywhere else, we have more trust that comes from relational connection.
When we open our eyes we meet inspiration everywhere, but i.e. the most songs were created just under the influence of living with people. Perhaps a dress’s your new friend will inspire you to design a cloth at current work. Hmm and later you maybe get bonus or at least you will gain in your boss’s eyes 😉 Another inspiration – somebody’s style living can impress you so much that you’ll decide on writing book about other people’ living. Perhaps you create songs from time to time and you’ll have chance to write a new one to music part of feast that new group of friends throws.
We’re inspiration for each other.
Facing with traumas, of course, is hard issue. If we have many wounds, people trigger us often. However, work with our minds is also a big relief and helps us to reach after the Life we want to Live.
Meeting with others always enrich our knowledge. Sometimes we hear of the new health restaurant around the nearest corner. And sometimes we hear about events that are more important for us.
Good cooperating with people let us live in more peace, have less problems, solve difficulties faster. And when we do things together, we feel more satisfaction, sense and closeness.
Mentioning about not expected circumstances… You never know if a simple house party in your future buddy’s house won’t turn into the beginning of dating with your future husband 😉 Or during walk with somebody you’ll see animal shelter, you maybe go there together and that visit will inspire you to work with animals 🙂 You don’t plan, but you get.
Taking a risk – when there is no worth to?
- When you don’t know the topic you want to venture just like trying to heal somebody if you’re not a doctor
- Doing something that is related to other stage than the current one i.e. relations, business plan – pod bulletami podać pare przykładów
- Without knowing why you want to do something, so you don’t know your motives
- Taking a venture that you’re absolutely not prepared for, the chance that is over your current level of something and is related to serious matter
- When you’re in strong emotions
The points don’t mention every situations. Life puts different circumstances and sometimes we’re not sure if that time it’s good to take venture. The above examples aren’t absolute.
Simultaneously, we can say that we dare by living. Every move in the world, whether in usual life or in e-life is a risk. After all, one message in an online chat room may make somebody i.e. really angry or really calm 🙂 For instance, imagine a woman who has a low level of emotional intelligence and very likes newest trends in fashion. Her friend is texting to her a message kind of: “Hey, do you know that the boots you wanted to buy cost half price, but only yesterday?”. The woman can stay in bad mood to the end of the day… Though, she missed such a good chance.
Another example is a photo of newborn niece, cousin of any baby that we get in message. And that e-message can lift us a week, two or more. We read the message and that move changes how we feel, and often what we feel impacts what we do in the nearest time. When people are devastated, many of them tend to do something destructive – drink alcohol, eat unhealthy, believe in dark thoughts – what, of course, isn’t good. If they didn’t see any hard message, that evening they would spend time in another way, more typical in their everyday lives. I don’t mean shifting blame on message. It’s about the fact that any move in the world entails the following one. No one has obligation to snack at night nor lose themselves in inappropriate habits taken to trying help themselves. But it sounds like every move is kind of venture.
Life is about taking risks.
Why do people don’t take certain chances?
- Because we are afraid to fail, make a mistake and even succeed
- Fear of people’s reaction
- Lack of faith
- Sometimes we don’t even know that we can dare
- In the past we have taken too big challenge at once and we are left with trauma
- We claim we don’t want, because it seems to be easier
- Most of us really don’t like to lose anything and venture is connected with that
That’s maybe unknown for many, but there’s fear of success in us. Success is change. Living with success involves some following challenges.
Looking at us, people can react differently. When we dare and we succeed, they can feel jealousy, joy or indifference. The first of them haven’t achieved own goals yet and probably they don’t believe they can. Second ones react from the heart and they work on themselves. The last group don’t look at you, they are focused on their own lives and aspirations. Even when we know that the first ones make auto-sabotage and that their reaction it’s not about us, we’re hurt when they express dissatisfaction or tell insults when we don’t have strong sense of self- value.
Even if somebody tells us: “You can do this”, often it’s hard to believe.
Simple lack of knowledge that we can venture makes us we don’t move. No one told us and that knowledge didn’t occur to us.
Typical point is memory about hurt failure when we behaved in too dicey way, loosing something or someone and staying with trauma. That block us, but we can get through. And what can help us are small steps.
We’d like to run away, and thinking about daring stress us out, so we kid ourselves that’s everything is okay and that we don’t have to do anything.
And generally, our brains don’t like loss, they prefer stay in “safety”, in status quo.
How to take a risk?
1) Want that.
2) Know your motives (you don’t have to feel motivation, of what I wrote there).
3) Say to yourself: „Yes, I’m feeling fear right now” – don’t displace emotions, just be with them, and next – „I’m going with fear, whatever will happen”.
4) Do this maan. Do this Maya Angelou. Do this whatever your name is.
How to learn overcoming fear?
- You can implement habit of taking a small risk everyday
- Visualise what you wanna do, train in your thoughts your way of risk, play your steps in your mind in several ways
- Wonder what consequences can meet you and how you’re gonna behave if the worst option happen? And pay attention what are you feeling while you thinking about the best course of events for you? Just in case, get ready also on that option 😉
- Realize that probably will happen something between “the worst” and “the best”
- Inspire history of people who struggled with similar challenges 🙂
- If you think about challenges in social interactions, practice that talk with somebody you trust, and ask them to not judge you
- Implement the challenge.
- Enjoy the risk! Catch your own hand, shake it and say sincerely to yourself: “Great that you did it! You moved, you went despite fear, I like it!” or other words that will make you feel strengthened 🙂
- Repeat all points or two previous points, depending on your needs.
Remember also about being patient with yourself 🙂
And if something goes wrong, try once again. And again. And the another one time. If you need take a breath, take a break, and come back later to your dream, to implementation of your aspirations, to next step in your business or anything you want.
In the past I blew many chances. I used to follow fear almost every time. In less important things sometimes I let go. We don’t have to think and do risk in zero-one way (zero-one means that a person does something always or never, and life shows us that many situations are something between, that all is up to certain things; between 0 and 1 we have so many numbers – i.e. 0,1; 0,22; 0,3456; 0,48924 etc.). Sometimes even we’re kinda forced to not taking risk even if we feel like to, i.e. when somebody wants to quit job, but they don’t have amount of money to survive next several months nor anyone who would sponsor their maintenance.
What helps continuing moving is seeing that you were able to do something once you do that. Seeing that you really can – and this is something that strengthen person.
Taking a risk is good not always and everywhere. It’s worth to know the field that you venture, at least a little, because some steps are doomed from the beginning.
And when things don’t work out at once, do not give up. Some of us used to let go too quickly, behaving in skittish way. That’s truth that there is chance of get burned, especially when we do something new, and this is something that we learn to deal with. It’s normal that our psychics want to go automatically, according old schemes like running away from precarious things and experiencing hurt, rejection or other unpleasant things. And that’s normal that first attempts can be shaky, unskillful, that because we just try things.
When we try, it’s worth to be “here and now”, without looking back kind of: “I tried so many times and I still don’t have effect that I wanted”, and without looking forward in a way: “It won’t work out”. That kind of thinking holds you up, because when you let that happen you don’t achieve what you want. It’s normal that satan incites us and we auto-sabotage ourselves, simultaneously let’s thoughts be just thoughts and temptation be temptation and we don’t have to succumb. We have a risk and job to take, and let’s show satan, thoughts and ourselves that we can go ahead and that we’re strong even though they mislead us.
That was my written speech about taking risks.
TAKE A RISK OR LOSE THE CHANCE.
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